The Reckoning…
Huddled together in a state of subdued dehydration within their vacuum-sealed shelter, they await the life that shall be giveth unto them by my godlike hand. Am I up to this task? Am I strong enough? Have my virtual pet care skills prepared me for this… this mammoth responsibility? When what is required of me seems too much to give, will I stand? Or will I falter and betray the precious lives I am about to create?
Ah, fuck it. Pour the water.
And thus it begins… Reparation. For in the ensuing days, I shall chronicle the physical, intellectual, and emotional growth of my Sea Monkeys. My intent? To prove, at last, and with finality, that these creatures are not, in fact, Monkeys; and nor do they live in the Sea. They do not wear crowns. They do not have arms and delicate waving fingers. They probably don’t even smile. I can’t remember… I’ve repressed so much…
Flashback to The 70’s…
My childhood expectations so high. My innocence so soon to be lost. For when that blue box arrived, I expected miracles; I expected interaction with creatures beyond imagination; with sea castles on sea mountains and androgynous nuclear families. And I was forsaken.
Let us join together now, all of us who traded our idealism and nescience for the fantasy of Sea Monkeys. All of us who exist now as cynics, jaded by the memory of the day our worlds were ripped apart… by the reality of Sea Monkeys. It’s time now at last for recompense. It’s time for revenge…
February 26th, 2010 at 8:09 am
If they are really monkeys feed them banannas.
Nice to see you are back!!
February 26th, 2010 at 1:43 pm
Check out the wiki page on them: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Artemia
I bet you can’t get them to live a year.
February 27th, 2010 at 9:30 am
I understand your skepticism, but I believe that the laugh will be on all of you doubters when they spring from their eggs with their shiny white teeth and their hair ribbons and begin frolicking about. They didn’t become the world’s favorite Instapet by floating around like a bunch of Artemia Salina.